The Name Game

Cletus, Cletus, Bo, Betus
Banana-fana Fo Fetus
Me My Mo Metus
Cletus!

As we cross the days off the calendar, Webhamster and I realize that we really need to narrow that list of baby names. Honestly (pinkie swear!), until the last couple of weeks, we had about four dozen names highlighted in the girl section of the "50,001 Best Baby Names" book. I'm uncertain as to why, but it is just so much more difficult for us to choose girl names. If Cletus were a boy, we'd likely go with Kieran, a solid Irish name, as our first choice.

For girls' names, though, we've just been unable to make progress. We read and re-read the highlighted names and then wrote them on a piece of paper. We then read and re-read the handwritten versions and thought about first name-middle name combinations as well as initials. For example, what if her initials were PIH, but someday she wanted to marry someone whose surname began with a G? At least that might make her decision whether to adopt her spouse's surname easier.

Webhamster said that any name should have to pass the "Fifth Grade Boys Test," a process that would give a group of 10- to 11-year-old boys five minutes to create as many insults as they could based on the name. I can vividly remember elementary school teasing sessions from boys calling me Mistake or Mosquito when they discovered that my middle name was Mystique. I suppose it could have been worse.

At any rate, since the New Year 2006 began, we have narrowed the list to five names that we really adore and that could be used in various first-middle name combinations. The plan is to go to the hospital armed with that list and give Cletus the name that seems to best suit her when we meet her. Of course, a divine stroke of inspiration could overwhelm us when she is born, sending those names out with the bathwater in favor of another baby girl name.